how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Randomize
