we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
