Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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