I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
sarcasm needs its own font
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
