I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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