I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Randomize