Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
he fucked my hip out of place.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
