U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
