Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
