im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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