was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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