Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
