I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I can't put those talents on a resume
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
