You smell like a Billy Joel song
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
