It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
