So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
