when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
