May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
