At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
