You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
