real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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