It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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