So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
