writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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