You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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