my phone needs a breathalizer
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
