I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
