I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
