Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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