She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize
