I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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