I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I met the friendliest cop last night
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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