Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
