the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
