Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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