I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
