I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
