You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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