Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Come on in and take your pants off
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