Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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