why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize