Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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