we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
