Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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