Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
