Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Alive.
So much puke
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
