How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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