The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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