I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
