Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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