my vag is so smooth its legendary
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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