oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize